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Old 2021-08-20, 23:55   #1145
rogue
 
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Not a joke as much as a headline for The Onion:

The Proud Boys, Oath Keepers, and Three Percenters are sending delegations to Afghanistan to learn from the Taliban how to overthrow a government.
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Old 2021-08-24, 06:51   #1146
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Old 2021-08-27, 08:29   #1147
Dobri
 
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Three forum moderators walk into the bar and the barman says, "You are no joke."
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Old 2021-08-27, 12:31   #1148
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A forum user walks into a bar and says ouch
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Old 2021-08-27, 12:56   #1149
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kriesel View Post
A forum user walks into a bar and says ouch
Reminds me of this one
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Old 2021-08-27, 13:08   #1150
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A wannabe comedian walks into a bar and the barman says, "Is this a new joke?"
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Old 2021-08-27, 14:36   #1151
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dobri View Post
Three forum moderators walk into the bar and the barman says, "You are no joke."


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Old 2021-09-02, 16:59   #1152
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Q: Why does a flamingo lift one leg when it stands?

A: Because, if it tried to stand with both legs lifted, it would fall down.
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Old 2021-09-02, 17:20   #1153
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Sardonicus View Post
... a flamingo lift[s] one leg when it stands ...
I find it amazing that the leg it stands on is always exactly long enough to reach the ground, never shorter, never longer.
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Old 2021-09-02, 19:53   #1154
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Quote:
Originally Posted by retina View Post
I find it amazing that the leg it stands on is always exactly long enough to reach the ground, never shorter, never longer.
Compare ducks and swans.

Calm and serene on the surface and paddling like buggery underneath, feet never quite touching the ground.
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Old 2021-09-03, 06:49   #1155
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Quote:
Originally Posted by retina View Post
I find it amazing that the leg it stands on is always exactly long enough to reach the ground, never shorter, never longer.
That's because in the past it was longer, but he cut it.

It is said that somewhere in our mountains there was an old shepherd who sculpted his wooden staff very nicely, you know these guys always have a Gandalf-style large and thick wooden staff they beat the wolves with, and they have nothing to do on the hills, they sit down, the sheep eat the grass, etc. Then this old guy, every time he sat down, he was carving a little bit into the staff with his knife (every one of them has a knife, didn't I tell you?), till the upper half became a true masterpiece. As he pastured his herds close to the road, a city guy passed the road with his backpack, wandering through those mountains, and he sees the herdsman leaning on the staff, but the staff was a bit too long and the old guy was staying almost on his tiptoes with the hands crossed on top of the staff, and the chin raised high in an incommode position on top of the hands. And the city guy was amazed by the stance, and more amazed by the sculpture on the staff.
So, after greeting each other, the city guy said amazed:
"Wooow man! So nice sculpture on your staff! Who made it?"
"Yeah, I made it", said the shepherd a bit bored, "but I am not so delighted with it, because the staff is too long and I can't lean into it properly, I need to stay on the tiptoes and my chin hurts..."
"Why don't you cut it a bit, to make it shorter, then?"
"Are you crazy? And destroy such a nice sculpture? It took me months to make it."
"Well, you can cut the down end, where is no sculpture..."
"You are silly. Why should I cut that end? It is here at the upper end what troubles me, not there down..."

Last fiddled with by LaurV on 2021-09-03 at 09:05
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